Yesterday a new friend who is also a cat-”owner” (I prefer “steward”) asked me whether our cat, Geronimo, brings us “gifts.” You’re probably aware that when cat folks use that term, they’re referring to a cat’s predilection for bringing its people rats, mice, squirrels, frogs, lizards and/or various parts thereof. And yes, Geronimo has proudly presented us with more than his fair share of the local wildlife. In fact, if we don’t keep our living room window tightly shut, we will glance up from our reading to observe, in horror, as our beloved feline lunges into the room with a live (or dead) rat in his mouth.

But when my new friend posed this question yesterday, I smiled and told her the strange truth. In addition to his lost-collars which we thought were long gone but which Geronimo often brings back, months later, our beautiful bulls-eye tabby

Geronimo With Prayer Flags and Bracelet

1) Tibetan prayer flags;
2) A brand-new blue-and-black woven friendship bracelet;
3) A rubber snake; and
4) Bikini bottoms.

His manner of presentation is always the same: we will hear him emit a very unusual cry at the living room window or the back door; when we respond, he’s either gently holding his gift or dropping it for our inspection.

At least one of my friends speculates that our poor cat is a kleptomaniac. I don’t know about that, but I am considering whispering requests into his fuzzy little ear. “Geronimo, see if you can find me $40,000 for graduate school.”

Really, is that any crazier than bikini bottoms?